Taking a Girl’s Virginity – Guide for Guys

by Ethan Steele

Are you dating a girl who is a virgin? Many men don’t realize that for women, losing her virginity is more complicated than you losing your virginity.

Often it’s an emotional (even painful) and vulnerable experience for many women.  So if you are dating a virgin, you want to prepare for a couple of possibilities in how she reacts during her first time.

Here are some tips on being with a girl as she is losing her virginity.

To begin with, its important that she is not pressured into doing it.

Most virgins wait months rather than a few dates to lose their virginity since it can become a big deal.

That said, women lose their virginity for two reasons. Some women lose their virginity because they feel its the right time and they are in love. Other women lose their virginity because they want to get it over with. In both cases, sex has often been made a big deal, either positively or negatively.

So it’s important that you let the girl go at her own pace. A key attitude you want to have is that you enjoy sex, but you want her to be at a point where she wants it to. If you (genuinely) make it her choice, she will appreciate it.

Since a lot about sex with a virgin involves her comfort level, you may want to try beginning with smaller steps before she is ready. This may take place over many dates and times.

For example, masturbating next to a girl can create intimacy that makes her more comfortable with you. Secondly, you may want to explore her vulva to give her a clitoral orgasm by going down on her or massaging her clit.

These experiences will accustom her to feeling an orgasm and becoming comfortable with foreplay. Keep in mind that you want to wet your finger if you touch her clit so that she has pleasant memories as opposed to painful ones.

Another level you can take is to finger her. This acclimates her to having something inside her.

Be prepared for her to feel some pain if her hymen has not yet broken. Often she may bleed or feel pain because of that. Its important to realize that for some women, it literally is painful the first couple of times she has sex.

At the same time, many women will have broken their hymen through activities that they’ve had as a kid such as doing the splits in gymnastics or riding a horse.

Finally, you want to be reassuring of her experience and keep her informed about where you are at.

There are a couple of small steps you can do. To begin with, do some foreplay to get her wet before you go inside her so that your penis slides in more easily and with less pain for her. Also, make sure she sees you putting on a condom.

Many virgins have less experience and are often more concerned about safety than others. So its important that she realizes that you practice safe sex.

If she feels pain during the first time. Ask if she wants you to stop or slow down. If she worries about the pain (if its simply from breaking her hymen), let her know that that is normal.

If she feels a surge of emotions, be supportive, especially since you never know what her previous sexual experiences have been. Overall communicate with her so that she can go through the experience feeling special.

Follow these steps so that her first time is one of her most pleasant memories.

Also, I found a website by a guy who's ex-girlfriend begged him to write down his sex technique for her because no man after her could make her cum every time. Click here to learn about his technique - it's fascinating.

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

screech June 14, 2011 at 6:58 pm

I have a problem. What if your girlfriend is the type that just wants to get it over with but truly believes it will not be good the first time? And she also wont let you finger her, massage her, or give her oral. I have no idea how i could even have sex with her because it is hard to turn her on and without foreplay i really see no way. Please help. She also says she wants to have sex but made excuses about me telling friends and such and one friend even said she was talking to her and my girlfriend said she would feel “awkward”. Is she lying about wanting to have sex with me?


Juice November 15, 2011 at 12:29 am

Well, you dont want to tell none of your friends, until you guys did it. And if she doesn’t want oral, thats normal. Some girls are concern and don’t know if they tase good or not, and sense its their first time they dont want it. Just rub on her butt and suck on her nipples. Make sure to not tell your friends. Because she doesn’t want people to know.


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